Slaughter Symphony: The Bakery VS The Grey Goo (Cookie Clicker VS Tasty Planet)

 

"Gluttony kills more than the sword." - John Wycliffe

The Grey Goo, the insatiable blob consuming all in its path

The Bakery, the everlasting desire to make cookies

Progression is a satisfactory yet dangerous thing and can quickly lead to one disaster after another. If left unchecked, it can cause the destruction of reality as we know it, and these two show, turning the universe and more into cookies and nanobots respectively. Today, let's play God and pit Eater VS Eatery. Will the Goo be satiated by the Bakery's never-ending supply of cookies or overwhelmed as the Baker gets a special grey cookie on their tray. Let's find out on Slaughter Symphony!

Before We Begin

While it isn't known if the three Grey Goos from Tasty Planet, Tasty Planet: Back for Seconds and Tasty Planet Forever are the same character, for the sake of including everything, we will composite each of the three variations for the blog. They aren't really all that much different or more powerful than each other anyway, especially when compared to say, Dio Over Heaven. I'll also be counting Tasty Planet Lite, Flash and Dinotime, since they're also made by Dingo Games as demos for their game, generally following similar stories. The first two have the same story as the original Tasty Planet anyway, so they may as well be a part of it. Only Dinotime is a bit different, as it ends with a level about the Goo eating the Asteroid that destroyed the dinosaurs and later Earth, but this doesn't really contradict anything as it later resets everything thanks to a time paradox, so it's reasonable to assume that it did still happen in canon.

The Bakery will get its main Cookie Clicker game, including all its mini games, current info on Dungeons even if it's not released yet, and seasonal events, thanks to the Seasonal Switcher allowing you to... Well, switch seasons. I won't cover cross scaling to other idle games though, since that would make this blog unnecessary long and complicated, and because... It's cross scaling. Most of us don't count it anyway since it'll just take away stats from the main universe by focusing on a secondary one.

Also, both of these two will be at their maximum potential. Largest size for the Goo and every upgrade for the Bakery, because... well, that's kind of the whole point of them. Death Battle normally uses characters at their maximum potential

Introduction

The Bakery

"You feel like making cookies, but nobody want to eat your cookies."

The story begins with you. A humble baker, one that cares for only one thing and one thing alone. Making cookies. So you click cookies, hire grandmas to bake cookies, make farms, factories, mines, fly to distant planets, dimensions, points in time, even other idle games, reshaping every known material into yet another cookie.

Of course, this doesn't come free, as all sorts of disasters occur from these results. Towns are destroyed, black holes created, and the grandmas arise to wreck havoc in the event called the Grandmapocalypse, where even your own empire is at stake. All this, just to make some cookies.

Grey Goo

"I call it, 'Grey Goo.' It can eat anything smaller than itself. Dangerous stuff, really!"

The story begins at a laboratory, where two scientists utilize nanotechnology and create a scientific break through... the ultimate bathroom cleaner! ...Sound like a bit of a waste for something like the goo, but whatever works I guess. Turns out, it did, but it couldn't really tell apart dirt from food, and as such it started to go on a feeding frenzy, entering on of the scientist's body, eating everything on a picnic table, getting thrown into the ocean, launching itself into space, and devouring everything, until it collapsed in on itself and imploded ala the Big Bang.

With order restored, the goo is recreated, as this time it eats a time machine to do everything all over again, devouring famous landmarks and altering the present in many different ways. Elsewhere, the Goo is taking to Mars, freed from an ice block by mistake, off to devour everything all over again, for history repeats itself as the goo feasts for itself.

Skill and Intelligence

The Bakery

The Bakery is skilled at baking cookies to any extreme necessary. They grow them in farms, mine them from the ground, summon them with magic, fly to planets and travel to universes made of cookies, travel through time to get past cookies, can turn gold, light and antimatter into cookies, and can generate them from money, dreams, sheer luck, other cookies, the game itself, other idle games, and even itself.

Since the Baker himself is capable of crafting (As judged by the All-Conversion achievement stating that you designed a universal converter) or at least utilizing technology and buildings strong enough to do such things, this should make him roughly a Type V Genius, affecting the game reality more real than even himself. Combat-wise... well, neither he nor any of his workers really have much. They exist to make cookies, not to fight.

Grey Goo

The Grey Goo... well, he doesn't really have any intelligence or skill feats. If anything, he's closer to the intelligence of an animal than anything, mostly relying on instinct. At most, he can make a few vocalizations, but smarts is not his strong suit at all.

Equipment

The Bakery

Cursors

The first building in the game is to bring in a fellow mouse cursor to help you out and click your cookie. Of course, these are used to click on the cookie and could be Metafictional Objects due to mimicking the mouse cursor, but they are also said to turn whatever they touch into cookie dough.

There is also the original mouse, which can be coated in all sorts of materials, some incomprehensible, some impossible to recreate, and some existing at every space at once.

Grandmas

The infamous Grandmas, they devolve into eldritch monsters as the game continues, they outlive the universe, they grow stronger with age, and they can even stop your cookie production. Fear the grandmapocalypse, prevent the grandmapocalypse.

Farms

Some say Cookies don't grow on trees, but I say they can grow in farms. They can come with a fungus that can produce poison in 36 seconds. The plants can also come alive. These farms also have a lot of seeds, including some that increase the chance of a Lucky Cookie to rapidly increase production and some that make Grandmas older and more powerful.

Mines

Unleash your inner Steve and go down to the mines to mine out some chocolate chips. These aren't used for much but can cause Earthquakes and other natural disasters with spells or just mining too much.

Factories

Kind of strange how we're covering these after farms and mines, but okay. These are pretty standard, minus the robots working in them, or the higher dimensional assembly lines. These factories are also home to entities beyond workers, like sentient cookies, living furnaces, and the Cookie Heroes.

Banks

Bit of a weird way to make cookies but, eh, capitalism says otherwise. These are pretty tough buildings, with scissor resistant credit cards and acid proof vaults.

Temples

If there is a god, do you think he likes cookies? Probably, as there are cookie gods to increase cookie production. We'll get to this more in Support.

Wizard Towers

I'm kind of surprised we haven't already used to magic to create cookies. These towers can lead to spells that not just increase cookie production, but also grant lucky cookies, increase their time frames, and summon wrinklers.

Rockets/Shipments

Space is massive, infinite in size even, and in an infinite universe with infinite possibilities, one of those possibilities is a cookie planet, where these ships fly to for more cookies. They've also been upgraded to include warp drives and robotic crews.

Alchemy Labs

In case you couldn't tell yet, the Bakery transmutates objects to cookies, and nowhere is that more blatant than with Alchemy Labs turning gold into cookies. It can do this to entire galaxies, liquids, children's nightmares and atoms.

Portals

If a planet isn't enough, then head off to the Cookieverse! An entire universe where everything is cookies! This is one of the more dangerous buildings, being able to corrupt and mutate others, cause people to age rapidly, can bring other dimensional monsters to our reality, and can even merge higher dimensions with one another.

Time Machines

Time huh? Thanks for the tip.

...Sorry, I had to. Apparently, the Bakery cares not for screwing up the timestream, as he can travel through time to get past cookies to increase the amount of cookies he has in the present. They can also mess around with time in other ways, given the additional clock hands, and the Baker doesn't seem affected by changes in the past, meaning this could be Acasualty.

Antimatter Condensers

Anti-Matter is a rare thing to access, and these guys can just condense it into cookies made of matter. They can also access dark matter, create black holes, recreate the Big Bang, reverse atoms, affect subatomic particles, which themselves are other universes, destroy quantum entanglement, pack cookies into one molecule, create flavor itself, which is a radioactive element, shrink down workers and create edible atoms.

Prisms

...You know, after we just talked about the Bakery turning Anti-Matter into cookies, them turning light into cookies doesn't seem as jaw dropping. Anyway, these babies can create chocolate light than causes skin conditions, hypnotize others, and set things on fire.

Chance-Makers

There's always a possibility of a cookie spontaneous appearing in your hand right now. Not a high one, but one, nonetheless. The Bakery decided to exploit that by harnessing the power of luck itself. That's already an incredibly low percentage, and they can also use this to cause coins to flip onto "The other side," winning the lottery, make unlucky things lucky instead, create zero-sided dice, and even predict everything that would happen in the universe down to the last particle. Junko Enoshima would be impressed.

Fractal Engine

This is a complicated building, and if I had to guess, it's a psuedo-glitch in the system, one that the Bakery exploits, being able to break down their own reality and create cookies with more cookies.

These things cause instant death on contact and can fill space, most likely with more cookies.

Javascript Console

This is where things get meta, where the Baker can use the code of Cookie Clicker itself to generate cookies. This basically allows the Baker to control the game itself, and leads to some weird stuff, like coffee talking to its drinker, or cookies baking themselves.

Idleverses

Cookie Clicker is more than an Idol Game. It is THE Idol Game, one that all others take inspiration from, so it only makes sense for them to take their generated items to generate their cookies back. These can also be used as escape pods in case one reality ends up being too disastrous, by just turning the idleverse into a copy of the Cookie Clicker universe.

Cortex Bakers

Artificially crafted minds, likely ones more intelligent than the Baker himself, these planet sized creations can craft cookies by mere thoughts. They can also control minds, shoot ionic flares the size of storms and grow tentacle-like spines for other tasks.

Themself

Yep. With nothing else to turn to, the Baker decided to use himself and his own bakery to bake as many cookies as possible and create clones. Many of them serve as a bonus head of his bakery, but some have gained some bonus powers, like laser eyes because, at this point, manipulating DNA is easy.

Golden Cookies

This lucky cookie can multiply production in any way, such as boosting buildings, the mouse and everything all at once, though it is for a limited time frame. While normally they just show up via luck, thanks to the spell "Force the Hand of Fate," the Baker can make these cookies appear pretty easily

Wrath Cookies

Not very lucky, these cookies decrease Cookie Production.

Sugar Lumps

While not a typical building, Sugar Lumps are often used to upgrade buildings

Grey Goo

Yeah... the Goo doesn't really carry equipment. It's can't really do that given its passive absorption and low intelligence.

Abilities

The Bakery

Transmutation

The most frequent ability the Bakery is capable of is Transmutation, turning whatever it possibly can into cookies, all through various means. This can go up to a Universal and Molecular degree by turning the universe itself into cookie dough.

Non-Physical Interaction

Extending off that, the Bakery can use all sorts of material to make cookies, including light, anti-matter, fundamental concepts of reality and the game's code itself, which would mean the Bakery can interact with metafictional objects in some capacity.

Luck Manipulation

There are some instances where the Bakery can just manipulate fate itself, either to give them golden cookies, or to make cookies out of sheer probability.

Earth/Weather Manipulation

As early as chocolate farms and mines, creating cookies gets bad for the environment, either via causing sink holes, earthquakes, global warming, making the Earth hollow, and many more issues.

Flight

Hey, spaceships aren't called that for nothing. These things are made to travel to the Cookie Planet and can travel across infinite space.

Dimensional Travel

Well, duh, dimensional portals exist to travel to other dimensions.

Time Travel

Another self-explanatory one, the Bakery can screw with time, like replacing politicians with lumps of cookie dough... which are probably better people to run this country TBH.

Omnipresense

There's no easy way to say it, the Omniplast Mouse straight up exists in every space at once.

Grey Goo

Absorption/Size Manipulation

Fitting for its Goo-like state, the Grey Goo can absorb any object it touched and grow in size from it, and this is a passive ability by the way, as shown here where it eats the Asteroid that would've killed the dinosaurs, without even noticing it until it collided with him. This can also extent to up to Conceptual objects, as the last object the Goo could eat in the first game was "Time Itself," though this was the only object of such stature that the Goo could eat in the series, as objects from other planes of existence weren't shown, apart from possibly the Noodly Monster, but we'll get to that later.

It's also likely a mass of liquid, making it a non-physical object.

Time Travel

The sequel isn't called "Back for Seconds" for nothing. In it, the Goo ate a time machine, and it allowed him to eat items across time, traveling to five different time periods. That did seem to be the extent however, so it's unlikely the Goo still has this, but I'll be generous on this one.

Reactive Evolution/Power Nullification

This is an odd ability, but in Cosmos 4, the Goo would normally die to a black hole, but when it grows bigger than it, it can eat the Black Hole, so it's not affected by its abilities by that point.

Oh, and since the Goo isn't affected by its gravity, it likely has resistance to gravity based attacks, as well as resistance to high heat and cold, since it can survive in space and eat stars.

Support

The Bakery

Gods

Thanks to the Cookie Temples, the Baker can summon gods and spirits to increase production in some capacity for a limited time. You've got Godzamok to cause natural disasters, Vomitrax to increase how long Golden Cookies last, and many others to increase cookie production.

Cookie Heroes

Art by Glockens

Probably the closest thing in the Bakery to actual fighters, the Cookie Heroes are the ones capable of fending off attacking workers, cookies and many other entities.

Eggs

During Easter, the Bakery gets access to various eggs, including those of Ostriches, Frogs, Sharks, Ant Larva, and the dreaded Wrinklers.

Wrinklers

These monsters are summoned during the Grandmapocalypse, and can conjured via spells, capable of not granting cookies, but draining them. There's also Shiny Wrinklers that grant even more cookies.

Reindeer

Basically a redesigned Lucky Cookie, these guys give cookies when clicked.

Santa Claus

Of course, in a game about making cookies, the famous cookie stuffer Saint Nic. would show up, capable of his typical stuff, like a bottomless bag, or turning into an unholy monster.

Krumblor

While technically not a god in the same way as those from the Pantheon are, Krumblor is certainly treated like one, given all the sacrifices. He can straight up bend reality and gain super intellect, likely comparable to the Baker himself.

Grey Goo

For the record, you could argue that the Goo's support would consist of other Grey Goos, like the one-eyed goo in BFS's Two Player mode, but since that's not mentioned in universe, nor did he show up in any of the cutscenes, I'm hesitant to consider that canon.

Stats

The Bakery

Strength

• Omniplast Mouse can redirect all Kinetic Power into its clicks (At least Universal+, likely higher)
• Cookies can turn the universe into Cookie Dough (Universal+)
• Cookies can rewrite the fundamental laws of the universe
• A minor cookie related incident destroys a town
• Chocolate mines can cause earthquakes and sinkholes
• Chocolate mines can flood villages with chocolate
• Factories have assembly squares, cubes and possibly tesseracts (4-D, possibly higher)
• Dimensional Portals are involved in a City-Engulfing Disaster
• Dimensional Portals with Brane Transplants can merge higher dimensions (At least 5-D, likely higher, Elaboration in BTV)
• Antimatter condensers make a Black Hole that swallows a town
• Antimatter condensers might make a big bang (Universal, Debatable)
• Can terraform an Idleverse (Universal+)
• Can pop an Idleverse (Universal+)
• Can compress Infinite Idleverses into small spheres (Multiversal+)
• Can control "Game Design," transcended programming that governs all the Idleverses (At least 5-D, likely higher, Elaboration in BTV)
• Cortex Bakers can create Weather Scale Ionic Flares
• The Cookie Heroes can defeat an Ascended Baking Pod (Outerversal, Debatable, see BTV)
• Santa can lift a bottomless bag (Infinite Lifting Strength, possibly Universal+)
• Unshackled farms can till the universe (Universal)
• Can ascend past everything (Outerversal, Debatable, see BTV)

Durability

• ...Probably scales to AP.

Speed

• Omniplast Mouse is said to be present in every space simultaneously (Irrelevant)
• Can fly to a Cookie Planet in a short time frame
• While there is no specification as to where the Cookie Planet is, it's likely outside the solar system, so using the Centauri system at 4.367 Light Years away as a base, and due to the game generating one cookie at a time, and the building starting off shipping 260 thousand cookies per second, it means the ship travels 1135420 Light Years per second, or 35.8 trillion times Faster Than Light.
• This is a relatively low-end estimate BTW. The achievement "Galactic Highway" implies that the cookie planet is either across the Milky Way or in another galaxy. The Milky Way is one hundred thousand light years away, so assuming the ship flies in the same timeframe, this would be 82 quadrillion C, while Andromeda, the closest Galaxy to the Milky Way, is 2.5 million Light Years Away, equating to 20.5 quintillion C.
• The "Restaurants at the end of the Universe" achievement says that the universe is spatially infinite, and that the Baker opened an infinite chain of restaurants in finite time, meaning his ship would travel at Infinite Speeds to do such a thing.
• Prisms allow cookies to be baked at literately the speed of light.
• Prisms can receive light from the other end of the universe (Infinite)
• Can transport cookies across universes (At least Infinite, likely Immeasurable)
• Cortex Bakers can shoot flares across space (Infinite)
• Unshackled shipments are said to be everywhere at once (Irrelevant)

Overall

• Responsible for the destruction of a lot of the multiverse
• Got very famous to a point where entities across dimensions came over to eat their cookies
• Got a 10-minute segment on the news

Grey Goo

Strength

• Can devour the Noodly Monster, which can devour superclusters (multi-Galactic)
• The Flying Spaghetti Monster is said to create metaphysics (Outerversal, Debatable, see BTV)
• Can devour the universe (Universal, Elaboration in BTV)
• Can devour Time Itself (Universal+, Elaboration in BTV)
• Can devour the Turtles of Time (At least Low Multiversal, likely Multiversal+, Elaboration in BTV)

Durability

• Can tank hits from Superclusters (multi-Galactic)
• Survived the Meteor that Killed the dinosaurs
• Survived getting hit by a whale
• Likely scales to AP

Speed

• Can devour Time Itself (Immeasurable)
• Can move freely in a void implied to be devoid of time (Inaccessible)
• Might have eaten every last Turtle of Time, which are implied to be infinite in number (Infinite, Debatable, see BTV)

Overall

• Ate the universe at least three times
• Became the Big Bang
• Got three sequels and some notoriety from bigger name Let's Players like Jacksepticeye

Weaknesses

The Bakery

The Bakery is centered around baking, not combat, so it's hard to say exactly how well it would do in a combat scenario. In fact, in general, the Bakery is centered primarily around cookies, rather than much else, making them a bit of a specialist, so it's likely not in character for them to fight much. Granted, they do a lot of dangerous stuff to make cookies, and many of these methods to do so are seemingly passive, but it's still worth mentioning.

Grey Goo

As I said in the Intelligence section, the Goo doesn't really have any intelligence feats, and generally seems closer to an animal, meaning it likely doesn't have the best strategic thinking or problem-solving skills. With the exception of unpredictable and uncontrollable Time Travel, all of the Goo's abilities are contact based, meaning he's heavily reliant on his size to attack foes, especially since they can't work on a target that is bigger than him. He'll usually get eaten against most of those, at least in the first game. We also see above that the Goo doesn't have Acasualty despite his time travel, and is vulnerable to time paradoxes, like when he ate the Earth before he was created, causing him to cease to exist. It also seems like much like his presumed inspiration, The Blob, he can be stopped by cold temperatures, as he was only functioning on Mars after the ice block he was encased in started to melt, though as the Goo grew he could devour the Polar Caps on Mars and survive the cold vacuum of space, so it likely has to be very potent by then. Lastly, despite seemingly like an unstoppable, ever-growing beast, the goo has died at least in the first game by becoming too big, where after devouring all of space and time, it implodes into a big bang because of its mass being too high to support itself.

Summary

The Bakery

Strength:

• At least Low-Complex Multiversal, likely Hyperversal+ (The Brane Transplant upgrade is said to merge higher

dimensional universes, of which there are at least 50, likely an infinite amount, can merge infinite idleverses into one, can access

game design that the idleverses oblige by) possibly Outerversal (Ascends above

every dimension, Cookie Heroes can defeat an ascended pod)

Durability:

• At least Low-Complex Multiversal, likely Hyperversal+ (The Brane Transplant upgrade is said to merge higher

dimensional universes, of which there are at least 50, likely an infinite amount, can merge infinite idleverses into one, can access

game design that the idleverses oblige by) possibly Outerversal (Ascends above

every dimension, Cookie Heroes can defeat an ascended pod)

Speed:

• Irrelevant (Omniplast Mouse exists in every space at once, including those beyond time)

Abilities:

• Omnipresence
• Transmutation
• Earth Manipulation
• Magic
• Flight
• Dimensional Travel
• Time Travel
• Non-Physical Interaction (Up to the Meta Level)
• Luck Manipulation
• Precognition
• Duplication (Up to Infinite)
• Reality Warping (Metafictional/Higher Dimensional Level)
• Genetic Manipulation

Skill:

• D Grade

Range:

• Hyperversal, Outerversal with Ascension

Intelligence:

• Type V (Invented various machines to affect the Multiverse, can predict everything happening in a universe)

Stamina:

• Superhuman

Weaknesses:

• No combat experience

Advantages:

• Stronger
• Faster
• Dimensional Range keeps the Goo at bay
• Can bypass the Goo's Durability and Physiology by transmutating it from a distance
• Reality Warping grants greater control of the battlefield.
• Outnumber the Goo by at least thousands to one
• Much smarter
• Nerd Cubed

Disadvantages

• Less combat experience
• Only has one game

Grey Goo

Strength:

• Multiversal+ (Devoured the Turtles of Time, which are infinite in size)

Durability:

• Multiversal+ (Devoured the Turtles of Time, which are infinite in size)

Speed:

• Immeasurable (Devoured Time Itself, can move freely in a timeless void)

Abilities:

• Logia Physiology
• Absorption
• Transmutation
• Size Manipulation (Up to Infinite)
• Flight
• Self-Sustenance
• Non-Physical Interaction (Conceptual)
• Time Travel
• Limited Power Nullification
• Ice Resistance
• Heat Resistance
• Gravity Resistance

Skill:

• D Grade

Range:

• Universal via Sheer Size

Intelligence:

• Below Average

Stamina:

• Superhuman

Weaknesses:

• Not very smart
• Can be harmed or eaten by larger objects
• Time Paradoxes
• Possibly Ice Manipulation

Advantages:

• Arguably more combat experience
• Passive Absorption can negate the speed edge
• GrayStillPlays
• Jacksepticeye

Disadvantages

• Weaker
• Slower
• No way to enter other dimensions
• No counter to Meta-Attacks
• No counter to Reality Warping
• Canonically vulnerable to Time Paradoxes
• Significantly less intelligent

Before The Verdict

The Cosmologies

Let's cover the Tasty Planet Cosmology first, since it's significantly less complicated. The universe in TP is pretty similar to our own. Similar planets, similar galaxies, similar general structure, apart from some occasional weird things, like Space Manta Rays and giant amoebas that can eat superclusters. It's when we venture outside of the universe where things get strange, as in the original and Back For Seconds, we see a white space, which is likely a real devoid of time, given how the Turtles of Time living within it in Back For Seconds, and its underneath Time Itself in the first game. Tasty Planet Forever however has each universe as a quark inside a larger universe. It's also worth mentioning that the universe in Tasty Planet is likely not infinite. While Forever might imply this with the final level being called Forever Feast, it ends with you devouring universes and escaping them, meaning those universes have a finite size, much like in the other two games. It's unlikely the Goo scales to the white space, due to never devouring it. There's also the Turtles of Time which... we'll get to.

As for Cookie Clicker, it is said outright that space is infinite in one of the achievements, and there do exist other dimensions judging by the news ticker. The Cookieverse is one of them and is said to be a subordinate/lower dimension. The universe itself is said to be a twisted self of another dimension, which itself is said to be "The Real World" according to the achievement, there exists a taste dimension, there's string theory which could be 11-D, the "Perforated mille-feuille cosmos" achievement implies there to be layers upon layers of dimensions, and we actually do get a figure being estimated at the high 50's. That's all just for the main universe, and there's also several other idle games in the game also called universes, an infinite amount of them within the multiverse, and some of them have universes within themselves, making the entire cosmology at least 50th Dimensional, and up to Infinite Dimensional if each idleverse is comparable in size to the Cookie Clicker one, which is likely given how some are copies of the CC verse, and dividing infinity by anything is still infinity. Lastly, the Baker can ascend past all of this, enter heaven and upgrade his Bakery even further... oh, on the topic of such...

Outerversal Arguments

Let's face it. Every character has an Outerversal Argument somewhere, no matter how ludicrous, and part of the appeal for these two is just a matter of how powerful they can be, so let's see if they can get this powerful. Let's start with the Grey Goo.

The argument stems from the Goo eating the Flying Spaghetti Monster, creator of Heaven and Hell, responsible for God and Jesus, creator of the supernatural, magic, metaphysics... except none of this is mentioned in the game itself. 

The Noodle Monster is simply a large creature devouring Superclusters with no further elaboration, meant to occupy a similar role to the Giant Amoebas in the first game, which have no scientific backing or explanation. They're just a fun little pseudo final boss that serves as a nod to one of the hardest enemies fought earlier in the game, the regular sized Amoebas. In fact, it's likely the Noodly Monster's existence is contradictory to the FSM, as a video detailing the FSM at 1:42 mentions him as a kind and benevolent creator, and yet in game, he consumes Super Clusters, destroying at least billions of lives without a care in the world, nothing like the religious texts state. It's like saying that the Goo scales to Godzilla because of the one time he ate Monsterzilla in Back for Seconds, where there's just very little supporting evidence to the claim.

It's unlikely that the Tasty Planet wiki is a useful source of information here anyway, as there's no sources correlating to the game itself on the Noodly Monster's description, and while Dingo Games does say the website is thorough, keep in mind that the tweet was sent before the release of Tasty Planet Forever, and mentions nothing on its accuracy to the lore. It's like Nintendo commenting on Racist Mario, where they address its existence, but don't say it's canon just because they're the creators and know of the other work in question. So no, the Grey Goo isn't Outerversal.

As for the Bakery, this can go either way. On one hand, the Baker can ascend to a higher level than the rest of Cookie Clicker, which is established to have several dimensions, and from there they can upgrade various devices capable of affecting the many lower dimensions, but we also see Cookie Heroes on a lower dimension beat an Ascended Baking Pod, showing that lower dimensions can still harm the entities, and there isn't anything (thus far at least) saying that they themselves have ascended, so it can go either way for both The Bakery and his Bakery.

That's not all though, as there are arguments of the two of them reaching High Outerversal. Starting with the Goo, they stem from defining the White Space at the end of the first game and BFS presumably being beyond meta-physics and dimensions, but as already stated, those don't really exist in Tasty Planet, and the context more so implies the white space is a timeless void, which at highest would be Low-Complex Multiversal, and since the Goo never ate this void, he wouldn't scale.

As for the Bakery, it mostly depends on how you view dimensions and Cortex Bakers, but for the most part they don't mention much about dimensions and upgrades usually don't correlate with each other in that sense, and similarly most of the statements of higher dimensions are rather vague and don't necessarily correlate to universes, so I feel like it's a safer bet to go for lower ends and assume these dimensions are across other portions of the cosmology. It doesn't really affect the verdict much anyway for the record.

Did the Goo eat every Turtle of Time?

So arguably the biggest thing in the Tasty Planet Series outside of the Goo, are the Turtles of Time, existing beyond the Universe and within the white space of nothingness, with the Goo being the only other entity to do so. We see many of them, and the story ends with the Goo devouring them, though it is off screen. This leads to two questions. One, did the goo eat them all, and two, how many of them are there?

For the first question, the answer is most likely yes, given how the final cutscene refers to the Goo's consumption as a past event, saying "It was a tasty feast, all the way down." It's also likely out of character for the goo to stop eating in general, given it's an ever-hungry beast that consumes anything in it's path.

On the other hand, the exact number of Turtles of Time isn't specified, other than them stacking atop each other indefinitely, however it is likely the value itself is infinite, both considering the never-ending stack, and how the programmer of the game, James Sayer, agrees they are countably infinite, and is inspired by the expression "Turtles all the way down," which itself represents infinite regression, implying that the goo did eat an infinite amount of Turtles, therefore making his final size Infinite, meaning the TP cosmology and the Goo himself cap at Multiversal+.

Does Ascending destroy everything?

To clarify, the act of Ascending itself causes destruction, as it's basically resetting the Bakery and likely undoing the damage it has brought, but it's not described as actually causing damage, so while it is affecting the cosmology, it's more so ending the affect the Bakery has on it, rather than destroying it entirely and making it anew.

Verdict

Stats

Probably the most important factor for the Goo especially is just how comparable it is to the foe in stats, and since he's likely infinite in size at his best, he'd be roughly around the rank of the Multiverse in Cookie Clicker, thanks to fairly consistent Immeasurable speeds and eating infinite sized Turtles of Time, as well as Time Itself. Not bad, but below the Bakery at its peak, even without considering its ascension, as they can manipulate dimensional spaces above the infinite multiverse at Low Complex Multiversal stats at the bare minimum, with objects that can exist within all of time itself at Irrelevant speeds. Even when considering the Goo devouring time, it did not devour the entirety of it in one go but rather tore Time apart piece by piece at significantly slower speeds by default, meaning even against a lower end Bakery, they would still be immeasurably stronger and faster than the goo, and since the Goo has never reached infinite size in game, it also means it's likely impossible for the goo to devour all of the Bakery at once.

That's not even considering higher end estimates, where it's likely the Bakery messes up other dimensions, of which there's at least fifty of them, nor ascension where the Baker ascends past every dimension or the Cookie Heroes matching that. Just a low-end of the Bakery would already be immeasurably above what the Goo can devour.

Arsenal & Abilities

Neither of these two have much in the way of abilities, mostly amounting to just really good cookie creation and absorption, but from there, the Bakery has a notable edge, thanks to them being able to manipulate all sorts of things, like reality to mess around the battlefield, probability to decrease the chances of them losing much, time to alter history, and the game itself to affect a more real reality, none of which the Goo has much counterplay to. Sure, the Goo can also time travel, but he can't control it properly, only has a few attempts to use it, and is still vulnerable to time paradoxes, which the Bakery is not, and maybe it existing in a white space beyond concepts makes him unphased by manipulating concepts, but that still doesn't help against Meta-Attacks.

While the goo's passive absorption can allow him to devour objects smaller than him regardless of their strength, he doesn't gain their power by doing so. For example, in DinoTime, the asteroid that would've blown up the Earth can be eaten before that, and yet the Goo cannot eat the Earth or blow it up at that time

And you might think that the Goo's Power Nullification would put a stop to its mass transmutation, but the ability doesn't quite work like that. It only works on objects that are smaller or comparable in size to the Goo, when it touches the goo. It hasn't shown to nullify ranged attacks like the lasers a UFO shoots, or the bullets of a Police Officer's gun. Since the Bakery can still transmutate objects and warp reality from other dimensions, it's powers wouldn't be nullified at all, and since the Goo hasn't shown to interact with meta-objects, like the size bars in the game's UI, it's unlikely it can eat every aspect of the Bakery, or the cursors or the Baker himself.

Tertiary Factors

In terms of sheer intelligence, The Bakery takes the cake cookie without any effort. Even assuming the Baker isn't capable of crafting or even operating any of his machines and just has average intellect or commands the grandmas or others to do the work for him, he'd still be smarter thanks to the Goo having the intelligence akin to a wild animal.

Skill-wise however, I'd give it to the goo. Yes, neither of them have any notable combat skill, but the Goo is at least put into more life-or-death scenarios than the Baker does.

Conclusion

While the Goo might be a feared force of nature, he's simply pretty badly outclassed here. The Bakery has better stats, greater range, higher intelligence, and many haxes that the Goo simply can't compete with, and any haxes to Goo has back, it can't use very efficiently, so it's very likely he'll just get turned into a cookie from a massive distance before he can eat every cookie around him.

As such, there's a very good chance that his victory is half baked.

The Grey Goo has been Slaughtered

The Winner is The Bakery.

Now, have a cookie to celebrate.